Who are you? We don't mean your favorite color, or what TV shows you watch, or what's your biggest fear. Instead, more like, who are you as an NFL running back?
We humbly ask this, because it is clear we do not know.
Let's revisit the tumultuous relationship between us, everyday fantasy football managers, and you, a professional football running back who has better things to do than worry about the misgivings of everyday fantasy football managers.
First, you were drafted in the second round by the Lions in 2020. On an offense littered with talent and expecting you to get a hefty workload, the Madman was excited. So excited, you could argue we had become Swifties before Swifties were a thing. (Editor's note: We aren't sure when Taylor Swift's Swifties emerged, but no need to check the timeline. We were first.)
Then, just before your rookie season, the Lions signed Adrian Peterson. (How many of you readers forgot A.P. spent one season in Detroit?) Sadly, this cut into your usage, yet you still managed to finish RB18 on the season.
Things would pick up in 2021, we were certain. Until the team added Jamaal Williams to replace Peterson. Again, you had to give up touches to another RB. Again, you made the best of it, finishing RB15. Then in 2022, Williams became a TD hog, and you dropped to RB21 that season.
Oh, if only our favorite Swift would get a fair chance!
Swooping in to save the day were the Eagles, who traded for you. That bad time in Detroit, you can shake it off, shake it off. And you did! You were lightning on your feet. From Weeks 2-6, you finished as a top-12 RB every week but one. Our Swiftie Swiftdom had finally paid off.
But then ... then came the bad blood. You averaged RB27 the rest of the season. On a good offense. With great skill players to loosen defenses. With a good O-line.
What happened? How could this be? You were so good for so long ... Wait. No, you're weren't that good for so long, we just kept waiting for you to get good. And when you did, it was short-lived. Workload could be to blame in Detroit. What was to blame in Philly?
If only there was a clue. A common denominator. What's that Mr. Swift? Could you say that again?
"It's me. Hi. I'm the problem. It's me."
You don't say. Now it makes sense. At this point, we rethink our entire D'Andre Swift allegiance. Perhaps there was a reason you never got the workload we dreamed for you.
Then you made the jump to Chicago this season. On a team with a worse offense, a rookie QB and a weak O-line. And there were other RBs who would vulture some of your touches.
Yeah, now we got problems, and I don't think we can solve them. If you couldn't crush it in Philly, no way you do with the Bears. Those feelings were reinforced when you were RB41 after three weeks this season. Our fantasy relationship ... at one point it was gonna be forever, but now it's going down in flames.
But then ... then you turn in back-to-back games finishing in the top three among RBs the past two weeks. We know you see what you're doing to us. Tell us why?
Ah, never mind. It is too late. That blank space on our roster? We are not going to write your name. We are never, ever, ever, getting back together.
What you have made us do is tell all our fantasy friends how great you are. Talk you up. Show your recent stats, but brush the bad ones aside. And maybe, just maybe, we can find you a new fantasy manager.
Call it karma, that we bail right as you find your groove. But we're going to trade you nonetheless. Cause we and karma vibe like that.
Outperformed and outworked Travis Etienne. Bigsby isn't going to outright take over the job, but he can be a productive member of a two-headed backfield.
Jaylen Wright RB, Dolphins
De'Von Achane suffered a concussion Sunday. If he misses time, the rookie Wright, who has been compared to the explosive Achane, will split work with Raheem Mostert, as they did in Week 5.
Tyrone Tracy Jr. RB, Giants
Raced to 129 yards on just 18 carries in the Giants' upset at Seattle. Even when Devin Singletary returns from his groin injury, Tracy is likely to continue getting a useful amount of touches. He could even eventually wrestle away the feature role if he maintains his Week 5 excellence.
Rhamondre Stevenson RB, Patriots
He didn't start in Week 5 because of his fumble problems. But he still got the bulk of the work, and he worked well. He remains a back-end RB2 or Flex option.
Cooper Kupp WR, Rams
He could return after a Week 6 bye. Scope out the manager who has him and exploit any impatience or desperation. Ditto for Puka Nacua.
Nick Chubb RB, Browns
We aren't convinced he is going to be what he was before the injury. If you have him, try to sell him. But if you think we're wrong and you want him on your roster, try now before he returns. You might get him cheaper.
Jonathan Brooks RB, Panthers
Similar to our Chubb position, only Chuba Hubbard could make it more difficult for Brooks to capture the job. Trade him to an overenthusiastic manager.
T.J. Hockenson TE, Vikings
With a bye next week, now is a good time to get in the ear of whoever has him on their roster and talk trade before he returns.